didn't get to experience 'fireworks' last night...
he said yest was a good time to celebrate my bday.
guess his intentions were good but his priorities were misplaced..
he sounded so irritated and impatient with me when i decided to watch a movie in btwn while waiting for dinner. he said 'someone want to watch movie then mess up (his) plans'. cos e movie ended later than expected.. after movie had to rush off in a taxi.. he was like walking way ahead while i was struggling to keep up in my heels on the slippery shopping mall floor...
i was rushed into a cab, then whisked off our dinner place.. taxi bill came up to $10 although it was just a few streets away.. again, he tsked in irritation. while i was left to wonder why on earth was he so uptight n y were we rushing here n there???
got to our dinner place, and saw 4 of my friends sitting there. w/o anyone saying anything i just sat there. i wasn't stupid. of course i instantly realized what was gg on.. he had planned a bday gathering for me..
but somehow it didn't seem to come together.. had to smile n entertain n 'look' happy... but at the end of it all, i was just exhausted, tired and just wanted to go home.
it didn't feel like my bday celebration at all somehow... but i was glad to have met up with friends i haven't seen in some time..
i guess i was overly sensitive and i was disappointed by him.
for a start, i didn't know of his plans. hadn't a clue. we were walking arnd, looking at stuff, talking a bit.. he said he wld send me home after the dinner was over.. but rather than drift aimlessly from 5 to 7pm, of course i tot it wld be good to catch a movie. my legs were tired after a day standing and i wasn't too keen on walking arnd for 2 more hours..
i didn't insist on a movie. he agreed too. so we went ahead. then halfway into the movie he said shldn't have watched cos now his plans were all ruined. i was just tinking to myself "restaurant reservation go late also nvm wat. what's the big deal?" he kept being restless, smsing on his hp...
then i had told him it was difficult to walk on the slippery mall floor. he said he wld walk slower n closer so i hold on to him if i were to slip.. but did he? no.. after the movie rushed to the taxi stand, he walked so fast i lost sight of him as he turned a corner...
then we arrived at the dinner place. got to the table, saw my other 4 friends. not a single word more to say like "surprise! had planned u a bday celebration!" nothing at all.. i sat down, feeling all awkward.. he bustled arnd more, smsing and calling, supposedly from friends who were yet to arrive. i was left to self entertain n wonder how was i supposed to behave or say..
after eating when i tot the worst of it was over, came the cake cutting.. he said it was a gd time to celebrate my bday. of course i thought tt it was my bday celebration.. then when the cake came, there were 2 sets of candles. and later they added another set.. so celebrate 3 pples bday together. i didn't know, but apparently one of my friends was also hving her bday the next day, and another 2 weeks later.. i just felt tt i was put into a very awkward position. as in i didn't mind celebrating with others. but no one told me, n i just thought tt.. ah.. oh wells.. ya.. just gao wei feeling...
then after eating cake and everything, time to go home.. he came over n told me to take cab home. didn't even offer to carry my stuff when i couldn't manage. not until i asked him to help.. i told him i didn't bring enough money to cab. he gave me some money and said tt he wld be taking another friend's car.. at least he bothered to walk me to the taxi stand and got me a cab..
he was so cold, unconcerned, detached.. i was left to wonder was all he said before not what he meant?
i was honestly disappointed yest night. there hadn't been any fireworks.. i didn't enjoy myself. the food sucked and i didn't feel that i had celebrated my bday. perhaps the only saving grace was meeting up with friends whom i've not seen for some time..
i had looked forward to a simple, no hassle dinner but it turned out pretty much everything opposite..
guess he meant well but nuttin turned out the way it shld..
oh wells...
what's a bday anyway.. just another year...
